The myth behind the Work-life balance between home and career is never great at the same time.
Expert Interviews: Naketa Thigpen, ThigPro – Balance & Relationship Advisor
As a repeated guest to this program, our friend Naketa Thigpen CEO of ThigPro and host of Balance Boldly Podcast, we are taking a different approach to her interviews.
You ever hear; “it never fails, either things are great at home and bad at work or bad at work and great at home?”…but it’s all a myth. Learn how to change your mindset so that your reality can reflect a more positive experience in both places at once.
ThigPro Balance and Relationship Management Institute is a Global Personal Development Company, based in the Greater Philadelphia Region. Providing Business Success Coaching, Balance & Relationship Management, and Leadership Development. They offer Retreats and Intensives to fast-scaling entrepreneurs and high-performing leaders across industries.
In addition, the Balance Me REMedy formula that sits at the foundation of their proprietary method, allowing them to accelerate client outcomes, they pride themselves on creating deep levels of customer intimacy with all of their clients and official power partners.
“The lack of balance is challenging for many people because they don't believe in it. They've allowed themselves to get caught up in the semantics of how you know, other people, whatever Guru is, you know, biggest on the screen at the time to define it that says, oh, work-life balance isn't a thing. It's work-life, harmony is integration. It's all these things. And harmony is a real thing. That is also not a replacement for balance. Once you're in balance, you can then create harmony in alignment with whatever it is you're doing.”
Home and Career is about Balance.
I created balanced to be a formula. So if you picture like when you were in 7th, 10th, and 12th grade, when you're doing fractions, there's a numerator and a denominator, right like something on the top something at the bottom, your truth, admitting the truth of what you really want is at the top. Underneath that are the boundaries that you set in place. So you can achieve that truth. That equals your balance. If you're constantly doing that, you are creating your balance, which is one step on your way to creating your harmony and your joy, right? It's kind of linear, if you will, from a formula perspective, but it doesn't look linear, because we have real lives that have you know, ebbs, and flows throughout it. If I admit to myself that I want to create a billion-dollar company in the next 10 years if that's my goal. And that's the truth that I'm standing, in the now, and I now have to create boundaries. There're different permission zones for boundaries over the different elements of your life. There's faith, regardless of your religious belief including your faith in yourself, do you believe that you can achieve whatever the dream is that you said? Or are you just saying it at parties? Because it sounds good, or are you saying something because you have an expectation, there’s a boundary zone for that as well.
Once somebody breaks your trust it is it's really quick to lose trust, it's extremely hard to regain it. Which also throws your relationships professional and personal, completely out of whack. When you and I will say pun intended, when you're out of balance of those relationships it affects everything that's a part of your boundaries zones. So you believe in yourself and having a sense of faith understanding that you need to break those expectations with your old self, what you used to say at parties and at meetings, you know, saying; “oh I'm going to be a leader of diversity and inclusion and equity”. Well, maybe that was your job in 2019…2020 may look different. So if it looks different for you in 2020, are you still having the same statement out your mouth, that you don't even believe in, you might not even want it anymore, right? Whatever that is, being able to break that expectation and live your truth and go towards that, allows you to be imbalanced. That's what allows all of us to have really good home lives. Because of your marriage, your sister ships, your brother ships, your family members, elders that you care for, if they all have awareness, that the truth for Lisa or for Leo, is to have a billion-dollar business like Naketa, then you should not expect them to be on every zoom party. It would be a little interesting to see you make every single joint map method event. People don’t have all that time to participate in what you’re doing. So we have to release people from those false expectations we've set because people have lives, we also have to not be offended and overly emotional. When someone can't attend allow them to make other arrangements with you. They don't have to explain why. All They have to say is there's a conflict for me. However, I value our friendship. Can I take you out? So we have a separate wind-down Girls Night and a couple of weeks. How are these dates for you? Because that might be more in alignment with a time or time frame that makes sense for my energy and my space versus me now trying to cram in Grace's party, Lisa’s fourth divorce party, you know all these things. It's too much. And now we feel stretched out overwhelmed. And the person that we are laying next to gets the mood…gets the attitudes…gets the frustration…and the don’t look at me right now. But it's not necessarily because he or she did anything to us. It's because we've exhausted ourselves not living our truth and having boundaries that allow us to get it.
For the full conversation between Gracie and Naketa, please view the video:
Tips and Advice from Naketa
If you are in a relationship with your forever love, craving a new way of being, one that won't require you to dim your own ambition, be intentional about your 'me time'. Fill up on pleasures that make you tingle, smile, spark adventure, and creativity. As you make room for yourself, you expand your heart and your patience for them…
Be willing to do the work on yourself, even when circumstances and people around you make it extremely easy to point out the wrong and justify your actions as reactions to the energy they swing your way. There's truth in that (and) the reality that you have the power to change the course of these experiences once you become aware of your own scripts, triggers, and in many cases, traumas.
Move towards your day with soft kisses and eye contact. It can be as simple as morning tea/coffee together for 5 minutes over a shared glimmer into each other's soul by simply being in each other's space without cellphones, news, and outside distractions. You may not be able to quiet other household noises at this moment and that's okay. Reflect on the moments when the distractions didn't matter. Remember when you were dating, early on before bills, business, in-law drama, and everything else crept in? You were able to sit in a crowded room and literally feel each other's conversation even when you couldn't hear them. Take the morning 5, and create that with each other again. It will feel awkward in the beginning, it will also be rewarding from the boardroom to the bedroom…
To learn more about Thigpro and the podcast Balance Boldly
Visit us anywhere you listen to your favorite podcasts, but Apple is a great place to begin: http://bit.ly/BalanceBoldly
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Final Thoughts from Naketa
Love yourself until you're full and you begin to live what you teach, preach, and sell others (personally and professionally). #LiveFully
Thank you Naketa, for always gracing us with your willing efforts to help others. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable, in sharing your lessons during your entrepreneurship endeavors. We look forward to seeing you back again!
Continue to watch out for more interviews, tips, and advice from amazing experts like Naketa Thigpen. Naketa is a great friend and will return back for further discussion and will be involved with upcoming events with us, stay tuned!
Naketa, as usual, it’s been a pleasure!
Until next time,